28 September 2007

Nintendo Wii

First of all, I need to have a rant so if you want to avoid this, skip to the next paragraph. I joined Facebook - I know, I know - as I was curious about the phenomenon. Straight away, a friend from uni got in touch so I've kept my account. I thought I'd do a bit of research and checked groups for breast cancer. Top of the list was the group 'Abortion causes breast cancer'. I was incensed. Irrespective of what you think of abortion, this group is at best dishonest - I won't tell you what I really think of it. The fact is that most women with breast cancer have not had an abortion, and most women who have an abortion will not develop breast cancer. Recent meta-analyses have shown that the risk is negligible or non-existent. At the most abortions could be a risk factor, but the link, to put it mildly, is no more than tenuous. The good thing is that it has woken me from my torpor - nothing like winding me up to get me going.

On a better note, I have given in and got myself a Nintendo Wii. It's good fun and it's actually going to get me to exercise a bit - relatively speaking of course. I started playing tennis straight away but could hardly use my right arm after that - my 'biceps' were so painful, I had problems brushing my teeth. This is bad enough without mentioning the knees and right hip. Mind you, I thought I was out of shape then came across something in a newspaper about levels of fitness in the UK - apparently more than 50% of people are unable to cycle for 20 minutes, 68% cannot do 20 sit-ups and 42% are unable to climb three flights of stairs without becoming breathless. This makes me positively average. Anyway, a few days on and I'm still aching so I'm going to have to be careful.

Other than that, I'm trying to find a rhythm again. My next treatment is on 8 October and I need to seriously think about getting involved in something as the treatment's not affecting me. I'm thinking of taking up a language, but something different - Mandarin or a Cyrillic language (as I am partly of Lithuanian descent). At a later date I'd like to do something a bit more demanding but I need to be fit enough. I'd like to have guitar lessons and do something woodwork related. In the meantime I'm working on my Wildlife Gardening course and trying to organise starting my volunteering at the Pesticide Action Network.

Stephanie, thank you VERY MUCH for the photos - they're great. It's so different to what I know. Michael, hope you've recovered from Wednesday. And Hazel, here's hoping we perform a lot better tomorrow and get the three points.

Be good.

18 September 2007

One year on

I started chemotherapy one year ago today - I can't quite believe it's been one year already. Not that it should come as a surprise, since I had six months of chemo, then one month off before surgery, and finally seven weeks of radiotherapy. It all adds up in the end. I'm just glad chemotherapy's well and truly behind me.

Yesterday I had my first injection of Herceptin, and thankfully I suffered no side-effects whatsoever. That in itself feels great but it wasn't what I'd call a good day. I hadn't realised I'd got quite worked up until Sunday evening, when the headache I'd had all day started to make me feel quite sick. The headache was still there yesterday morning, and the digestive system had joined in. So I made my way there, with my Mum, feeling miserable. Although my appointment was at 10am, I wasn't seen until 11.45am - this didn't exactly help the nerves. The nurse then had problems with my veins - I had to place my hand in a bowl of hot water, which didn't help as much as hoped: two veins blew, and one semi-collapsed, leaving me with three bruises. The injection itself was fine: it lasted 90 minutes and there were no side-effects. Unfortunately, as a precautionary measure, I was made to stay on the ward until 5.20pm. I think the only way I can explain how bad this place is for me is by saying that I didn't drink or eat anything - I was far too tense to do it, if that makes any sense. The chemotherapy ward is a place where people clearly look ill, if not when they get in, as the treatment progresses. You walk in looking pale (usually) and you slowly turn into a weird shade of grey-green. Yesterday was particularly bad as several people were wheeled in looking extremely ill - the stereotypical cancer patient, emaciated, all skins and bones. At one point, a woman was clearly suffering and groaning in pain, and had to be given oxygen. I did find yesterday particularly upsetting - I don't know whether it was because I was very tired and stressed, but I was close to tears. Compared to what some people have been through or are going through, I have had it easy. And I've had some pretty bad times. I can't imagine working in such an environment, but the nurses there do an outstanding job. You always here about how bad the NHS supposedly is, about how unhappy nurses are, but if they are, they certainly don't let it affect their jobs. They make the whole experience a lot easier for the patients with their caring, kindness and sense of humour, and they're doing it under very difficult conditions. They deserve a heck of a lot more credit than they get.

Other than that, I don't seem to be having any side-effects with Tamoxifen either. Maybe the nausea of last week was down to stress, or something I'd eaten or even a bug. Besides the exhaustion caused by yesterday's trip, I feel fine. I'm not complaining.

I hope life is treating you kindly. I'll try and sort some more photos soon.

14 September 2007

All sorted

The appointment on Wednesday went as well as these things can. It was basically a follow-up appointment and the oncologist was happy at the very good recovery - my skin's not far from back to normal. She also prescribed some anti-sickness tablets as Tamoxifen has started to make me feel quite unwell, keeping me awake most of the night. It seems to be helping, I hope I've seen the worst as far as this goes. I suspect you can't expect any hormonal treatment to be easy going.

I also mentioned the pain I'm in if I do anything remotely demanding, and I was told that I needed time and to be patient. From what I've read, the second chemo drug I got can cause mid- to long-term problems - neuropathy being one, and this could explain the pain. It's a bit frustrating - I think I was patient enough whilst undergoing all my main treatment, with the view that things would improve almost straight away once it was all over. It's not a major problem as such, it's simply not a problem I was expecting.

I received a phone call earlier telling me I'll be starting Herceptin on Monday, with the bonus that I'll have to spend six hours in hospital to monitor any possible side-effects. I'm not sure if I'll have someone with me - my Mum has a course in the afternoon, but Laura has offered to come with me, though she's supposed to be going back to Cornwall on Monday.

I guess I'm not having the best of times right now but I'm sure it'll all settle down soon enough. Enjoy your weekend.

Oh, Stephanie, I'm not sure I could live without any lush green vegetation - have you got any piccies of what plants you do get? Hope you're all well.

10 September 2007

Back home

What can I say? I don't think I'll ever be disappointed when going to Cornwall. We were very lucky weatherwise - there was only one day of drizzle. There were clouds of course, but a lot more sun, especially near the end of our stay. The wedding was extremely enjoyable - it had Laura and Bradley's stamp all over it. Laura wore a beautiful green dress made by our mother and Bradley wore a classy suit (I'll have to try and nick some photos from someone/somewhere - I didn't have my camera with me, what with being the chief bridesmaid and all). The ceremony was laid back, simple and pleasant. We all moved on to a military base for the rest of the day where we ate some very good food. All in all, a perfect day. I'll update the website soon so you can have a better idea.

The rest of the fortnight was spent on the coast, visiting National Trust places, Lappa Valley and the Eden Project, among other things. I wasn't able to do all the things I would've liked to but I had a brilliant time. I haven't sorted my photos yet so I'm just including a couple. The first one is of Trerice, which is an Elizabethan manor house complete with gardens.


The second one is of Bedruthan Steps, which are volcanic rock stacks resulting from erosion. Photos can never really convey such places - it was very, very impressive - and we couldn't have asked for better weather.


As for my treatment, I started taking Tamoxifen on Saturday evening - I'd promised the registrar I'd start taking it as soon as I got back from holiday. I'm feeling slightly nauseaous but no other side-effects so far. I gather they might come later. I have an appointment on Wednesday 12 September to see my oncologist. I think she'll check how my skin is recovering following radiotherapy, and I suspect we'll be looking into starting Herceptin. I can't say I'm overjoyed by it, but as has become the case, it's got to be done.

I hope you're all well.